As a young constable who commenced his journey with Victoria Police 27 years ago family violence wasn’t on my radar.
My focus, as was the rest of the organisation, was on catching car thieves and burglars.
Our main aim as a policing organisation is to protect life and property.
Thus my focus as a Local Area Commander is to identify where people feel unsafe, and the sad truth is that people feel unsafe in their own home.
You are more likely to be assaulted in your own home by someone who supposedly loves you than on the street by a stranger.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a loving caring family environment.
My father was a good man who never threatened or harmed my mother.
However, the statistics tell me she was one of the lucky ones.
One Australian woman every week is killed by a current or former partner.
One in every three women will be a victim of family violence during their life time.
I challenge you to stop and count the number of women in your life, your mother, your wife, your daughter, your sister.
The statistics are clear: there is every chance one in every three of the women closest to you will be the subject of family violence.
These figures are damming, damming of men! What type of man assaults his wife? Intimidates her, threatens her, emotionally abuses her through continual put downs, humiliates her in front of others?
What type of male controls what his partner wears or who she can and can not talk to?
I spent most of my youth and adult life in and around sporting clubs, I am not on some sort of feminist crusade.
But there comes a time in every person’s life when you decide enough is enough.
My staff attend family violence incidents every day of the week.
The situations they see and deal with are horrific.
They deal with women who have been brutally assaulted, punched in the face, set on fire, raped or even murdered.
The list goes on and on.
What gives men this sense of entitlement?
The statistics I quoted earlier are national statistics, so what is happening here in our own backyard?
In the last 12 months there were 7185 reports of family violence in the City of Greater Dandenong, City of Casey and the Shire of Cardinia.
To put that into context, police take a report of family violence in these areas approximately every 70 minutes.
Police laid 2783 family violence related charges and were applicants in 1880 intervention orders.
Don’t be mistaken in thinking that this insidious behaviour is confined to men abusing women.
We supported 486 children who were victims of family violence assault.
As damming as these statistics are we know that family violence is still significantly under reported, so I shudder to think what the real number is.
There are so many atrocities happening around the world at anyone time, but this issue is so big on a world wide scale in my opinion it is arguably the greatest human rights issue across the world.
So who commits family violence?
As some people would have you think it is not your stereo typical beer drinking, low socio economic thug.
Offenders come from all walks of life, professional, trades men, teachers, politicians and the list goes on.
I know of several extremely well respected men within the broader community who have recently been perpetrators of violence against women and children.
I can assure you they are shown no favours and face the full force of the available law at our disposal.
If there was 7185 reports of random violence in our streets there would be a community out cry, and rightly so.
So why does the community tolerate this constant violence against women and children behind closed doors?
In my eyes there is no difference between an assault outside a night club and an assault behind closed doors by a family member.
A crime is a crime regardless of where it occurs and who commits it.
Offenders are arrested, handcuffed and where ever possible remanded in custody.
So what are we doing about it?
I am pleased to say that the response to family violence implemented in Casey, Cardinia and Greater Dandenong is seen as best practice.
We have 25 officers dedicated solely to supporting victims of family violence and targeting offenders.
We work very closely with local agencies that provide support to victims of family violence.
Never before have Victoria Police taken this matter so seriously.
But this is not just a police issue.
We can not fix this problem by arresting our way out of trouble.
We need to change community attitudes; we need to change the attitudes of men. And who is best placed to change the attitudes of men? Other men!
I am not asking men to act as vigilantes and burst through the door and prevent a woman from being assaulted.
But we need to change attitudes towards the way we treat women.
We need to challenge sexist comments, the grabbing of a women’s backside in a night club.
Strong men showing strong leadership is what is required.
Without it we won’t change community attitudes on this issue.
I liken the challenge to the journey we have been on regarding drink driving.
It took 30 years or more but it is now socially unacceptable to drink and drive, we need to start the journey to ensure it is not acceptable to demean or treat women as second class citizens.
I am proud to be a mentor to community leaders who have stood up and said enough is enough.
These community leaders from a range of backgrounds including business, sporting, cultural and other community groups have signed up to participate in the Challenge Family Violence Project.
They are committed to influencing other men in their own environment that violence against women is not acceptable but, more importantly, they have committed to challenging inappropriate behaviour.
My challenge to all men is to stop and think about your behaviour towards women.
The easiest way to assess if another males behaviour is acceptable is to ask yourself this question.
Would I want him saying or doing that to my daughter?
If the answer is no, stand up and be a real man and challenge that behaviour.
